Tuesday, 26 December 2017

Go home, 2017, you're drunk.

Ugh. This year.

I don't feel like going into the gory details, but these past 2 years have been just awful in so many ways. The past 2 months have been some of the hardest months I have ever had to face. It is still ongoing. Christmas/Yule was a bust this year. My own practice has taken a backseat to all the chaos that is currently reigning supreme.

I am exhausted and worn out and just done. Done. I couldn't be more done. Mentally, physically, emotionally, esoterically. I feel like I have been fighting a war and I'm at a stand still. I feel like I've aged 5 years in the last one.

Despite all of these setbacks, all the exhaustion, and all the utter horseshit that this year has been, there have been some wonderful parts of it. The actual bits of my spiritual practice I have been working on have been really affirming and give me confidence. My family and friends are wonderful, beautiful human beings who have been immensely supportive and wonderful. I always find it interesting that you truly find out who is a true and steadfast friend when trouble rears it's head - the ones who stay are the ones to be treasured. The few goals I set for myself (my reading goals, my decluttering and downsizing, and improving my finances) have been very successful. I have a great many things to be grateful and humbled by.

Trust me, I count my blessings every single day.

Despite the 3 ring shit circus that is currently masquerading as my life, I hold a great deal of hope that things will improve. I know that it is hard and it will take work, but I also know that in the end  it will all be worth it!

So I know I haven't been around as much as I would have liked. I am hoping to change that in 2018. I hold a great deal of hope that life will settle and I will have other, new goals to look to.