Sunday, 1 November 2015

Hal-Con/ Samhain Mischief

October has been a strange, strange month.

It has been a month of incredible ups and downs.

Firstly, I had a lovely vacation back on my island home. It was lovely to see the people we did. It was relaxing.

On the flip side, lots of changes happening in my life. Nothing I can really get into, as the people involved have not announced things publicly, but it's got me feeling mixed up inside. Happy, but very very sad. It is the culmination of that Death card popping up, and it makes life a little more dim.

All things said, I feel like taking some time off was a great thing. It gave me time to deal with things, gave me time to feel things (which is so important, guys. So many people don't allow themselves to just feel how they feel, good or bad. It can make all the difference.), and in the end, was a good thing. I go back to my day job (hopefully temporarily) on Monday with trepidation.

This past weekend has been a flurry of activity. Hal-Con has been on, and we've gone for the past few days. I'm usually not great with crowds, but I felt like no point was exceptionally crazy. I had a few instances of there being just too many people, but I got over it and moved on quickly without incident. I am not a crowd person, and I'm pretty introverted. I spent 10 hours there on Friday and 8 today. I'm supposed to go tomorrow too, I got the weekend pass, but I am feeling utterly wiped by just being there that I don't know if I can muster it. It is super fun and worth the cost, but I may just need some quiet time tomorrow.

Tonight, on Samhain, my coven went to the public ritual that was being held. My city has had one since 1997 - some have been phenomenal, some have been just okay, and some have been absolutely wretched. The gentleman who usually runs them does a great job - he's had some off years, and some fantastic years. I have not been to a public event in about 4 years (because the community is full of racists and cowards who shelter them), but we thought tonight might be fun.

It was an amazingly good time! We danced, we sang, we offered to our loved ones, to the gods. We scared a few normal onlookers (I heard one man say to another 'let's get out of here quickly'). We drew a crowd of onlookers. I got to light stuff on fire and wave it around. The drummers was phenomenal. It was a great crowd.

We came home after, I made the traditional cider (though maybe with a bit of spiced rum this year!), we ate a meal and drank together. As the coven drifted off into the night and I was left alone with my time, I set out offerings of mead, tobacco, and wine for my gods and ancestors. I lit candles and sang their praises. I burned sweet offerings to them. I then asked for their guidance, and shuffled my tarot cards, asking for guidance on the next year.

Tonight brought me the Emperor, asking me to take a leadership role in my own life and my future; and the Page of Cups, asking me to be more open and self-loving about the process and to others. I need to build a strong relationship with my future, and be structured and diligent about maintaining.

As I wait for my candles to burn low, I thank my ancestors and gods and spirits. I drink deeply of their knowledge and experience, and seek to learn what I can from them.

As the clocks tick back an extra hour tonight, I am rejoicing in an extra hour of sleep. I grow more and more tired as the minutes tick on, so now seems the time to pour myself into bed to awake to a new month with new possibilities.

Mischievous Samhain blessings to you (and holler at my Beltane readers in the land down under!). Dream of your loved ones tonight.